Snow or Rain?

January 3rd and it is pouring! A year ago we had so much snow we couldn't open the doors! It's January!!! I want snow! Just one or two good snow storms a year is all I need. Not this crummy dark gloomy wet day we are having right now. It's almost 50 degree's. .it should be 20! But that is coming this next week from what the reporters are forecasting. Bitter cold temps!

I try not to let the weather affect my mood and attitude. Choose your mood and attitude. .don't let it choose you. It's hard on days like this when it would be simpler to crawl up in a chair and let the dark gloomy sad thoughts over take you. It could be done so simply but I am choosing not to do that today. I'm choosing a sunny weather mood and thinking good positive thoughts. All the lights are in the house. the candles are burning. Chatting via text with a good friend about everything from our kids to movies to health issues. But if it would snow I'd be even happier! I just need one good snow day to play in it, take pictures and make it feel like winter. But for today I will choose to be happy in my sunny attitude and house!

2014. .The year of Loss

It's another New Year's Eve. . which of course means more reflection time. I spent most of the night until at least 3 am reflecting again on 2014. Searching for the one one word that would describe it. I know my previous post was about what I learned in 2014 but now I was looking for the one word that would describe the last 364 days as I have yet to get through the last day of the year. It's 6 am now and I have a few hours left of 2014.

So what's the one word? Lost. No I'm not lost but I lost a lot of people in 2014. No not but they going to their heavenly home either. Just lost to the crazy journey in life.

I lost 4 important people in my life and one yes one fur baby who passed.

Two dear friends took paths in life that didn't include me. These hurt the worst as they still cause me much pain and sleepless nights. Both friends who didn't know each other so two of my boulders in my stonewall are gone.  My boulders are the strongest people in my wall. Another day of writing I will explain that wall but yes two giant holes in my support wall are gone. Two ladies that I thought would be there for life.. .   after all they had been there 21 years and 33 years. Friendships built that I depended on, trusted, thought would never fail. Tried and true. But now both are gone.  I have reached out many times of the past year. .year and half. .but never got much response and neither of them made an effort. You stop reaching after so many times getting your hand slapped. I miss them terribly but I don't know what else I can do. I can forgive as that is the right thing to do which I am working on but I can't reach out anymore. It's obvious I have done something but I don't know what. It must be me to lose two of them. .but I need to move on. .find new boulders.

Two other people in life I lost are my children's boyfriend/girlfriends. Both of them were part of our family for over two years each. We had become a group of six! We did everything together. .dinners, vacations, holidays, weekends. .whatever it was it was the six of us. One relationship faded as slowly as it begun. I didn't really think he was the one for her but that isn't my decisions but I had started to come to realization that it was going to be a permanent relationship and then I started seeing the changes and knew it was ending. A young man that we had grown to love and care for . .and suddenly we were a group of five. 

and now as I write this I see a girl I was 110% sure was going to my daughter-in-law slipping away.. they are young. .and growing . . life happens. . . .they are both restless but it doesn't make it hurt less. I still have hopes for this relationship and that one day she will be walking back in my door. I know they are still seeing each other occasionally and talk frequently so I still have hope. .and you always have to faith and hope.

My hardest loss of all. . .my fur baby. .I can't hardly write that without tears springing into my eyes. I had him for 17 years! An extremely long time for a dog! I was blessed to have him that long. He lived much longer than any one expected and he went peacefully and in no pain here at home with us all with him. He became my third child. The house is soooo empty at times and I still holler for him occasionally. I finally just last week cleaned out his things and took most to the local shelter. I am sure he would have wanted that if he could have actually told me. Time will bring me another fur baby. . .but not yet. .I still have healing to do.

Healing from the year of loss. . it will happen. . I've lived long enough to know that the pain will turn to memories and smiles. .but getting there takes time and it's not time yet . . .

So here is to 2014. . a year of loss and learning. .hoping to turn the last page in the book at midnight tonight. . 

What I learned in 2014. . .

A new year is peeking around the corner. .yeah 2015 is coming soon. It's the time of year many reflect on the past year. I am usually not one of those. Okay. .yeah I might spend a brief few moments reflecting but not something I spend much time on but for some reason I have spent a lot of time in the past 24 hours reflecting on 2014 and what I have learned. Here goes:

1. I've learned not to get attached to people. 2014 has brought me a lot of heartache in that department. I have lost people in my life that I thought would be dear friends for this crazy journey. How disappointing that has been! I have also lost people who I thought had become permanent fixtures in my children's life only to find that wasn't true either and to learn later on they weren't who I thought them to be. How disappointing and hurtful this can all be. So I have learned not to get attached to people. Real friends are extremely hard to come by!

2. Cherish your coworkers! I spend more time during the week with my coworkers than I do my family. Think about it! You see your coworkers more hours a week than you do your family. You might as well like them. It was a hard learning year in that department but I found out that my coworkers really do have my back and our relationships go way beyond the office. I am blessed to work with so many great woman who create no drama! It's amazing!

3. Parenting is just as hard when your children are adults as it is when they are three. Learning to let go to a point. .learning to parent twentysomethings is fun, interesting, challenging, strainful, exhausting and joyful. .just like when they are 3! I've learned parenting is the same no matter what the age!

4. Shoot. I don't even know what point number 4 is! Maybe I'll just stop here and add on when I figure out what all I learned in 2014. . maybe I learned that nobody read my blog! LOL!

Hello?

Hello. Hi. Hey. Howdy. Anyone out there?

Is wasted time really wasted time?I

"Hey! Stop watching tv! You are wasting time"

"Oh facebook is a waste of time!"

"Why are reading that? You are just wasting time!"

"Don't waste your time with that movie!"

We've all heard it. Stop wasting time! You only have so much of it! Well I keep wondering. .if I am doing what I want to do be doing is it really wasted time?

I enjoy a good television show. Is that wasted time if it's something I want to be doing? I'm not being lazy sitting there watching it. I'm usually folding laundry or working my mind on how I would handle the situation I'm watching. Sometimes I am even baking or working on a project. So if I enjoy watching tv does it make it wasted time?

So that brings me to Facebook. Yes I enjoy facebook! I enjoy seeing people's pictures and their status of life. Sure people make it look glamours or fun filled but if you are in touch with reality you know nobody has a life like that. I enjoy seeing my family and friends children grow up and grandbabies come along and new homes. It makes me feel in touch with the world and when I do see someone with a heartache I like to reach out to them in prayer or with a card or just something to make them smile. So yeah. .if I am on facebook and it's what I want to be doing. .is it really wasted time?

I enjoy a good book! Oh how I love to read! I don't get to do it as much as I use to so it's a treat when I find the time to do it. I like to read romances and biographies. I like to reach religious self help style books. I'm not a huge fan of mysteries though. I find reading lets me relax and go off into another world. Is that wrong? If I enjoy treating myself to a glass of wine or iced tea and a lawn chair and reading for an hour is that wasted time?

Movies! I guess those could fall into the same category as television. I don't go to the theater very often to see a movie. I do like doing it but it is way to expensive! But a few times a year a movie comes a long that I want to see on the big screen with a crowd of people and big tub of popcorn. Yeah sometimes it's not about the movie. .it's the experience! A dark cold room in the summer time when it is 100 degrees outside. .a diet coke and some popcorn can take the edge off the grumpies and relax me! It's not always about the movie but the experience so if I am enjoying it and it is what I want to do is it wasted time?

I'm not saying that I bypass things that I need to do. .laundry, housework, time spent with my family and friends, work among other things but really please don't tell me I am wasting my time because it's my time to decide how I spend it and if these are things I enjoy doing it then I'm not wasting it! I hope you enjoy not wasting your time the next time you do something YOU want to do!

I hate chocolate!

I HATE chocolate! . . .snicker. .snicker. . :)  Snicker? Did I say Snicker. .as in Snicker Candy bar? Oh my!!! I hate chocolate!!! I hate it because it taste so good! I hate it because it makes my clothes fit tighter! I hate it because it calls my name when I go through the check out at the store and there is a a Hersey or Dove bar just whispering my name.. yes I hate chocolate! 

My chocolate doesn't have to be a fancy chocolate. Just milk chocolate please! I don't care for dark chocolate. I know it's "healthier" but it does nothing for me. White chocolate is okay. It doesn't get me excited either. But ohhhh the smooth taste of milk chocolate. .oh the slow melt of creaminess is just the perfect taste. .but oh I hate that stuff!!! It melts in the summer time faster than I can enjoy it. ..it makes the scales go up instead of down and it is so tempting. .so yes I hate chocolate! Simple as that. .I hate it!

She has legs!

She has legs!
As many of you know from some of my previous blog post I am a BzzAgent. It's a great program! You fill out surveys that take just a few minutes and they match you with companies who needs people to review their products and your mailbox starts filling up with products.

I'm currently reviewing the Schick Hydro Silk Sensitive Care Razor. I received a razor, 3 refill cartridges and a travel case. They also asked us to review shaving cream as well. They included coupons for a free can Skintimates.

See the little yellow bee on the right background? That is the tape on the outside of the box! So cute!

On with the review! I'm totally in love with this razor! Until now I've used the Venus razor for several several years and was always happy with it but after trying this one I'll be switching! First of all I love the way the handle fits in my hand. It has a nice grip and it's just the right size to fit in the underarms.

I was also impressed with closeness of the shave. Very smooth and I didn't have any red bumps or  nicks on my legs.  They were summer ready in the  middle of winter! The blade pivoted well around the ankles and knees without snagging. The moisture strips would allow you to shave with just water if necessary. Most of the time I just use soap to shave with anyway which leads me to the Skintimates. Although it had a nice fragrance and worked well I'm not sold on the fact of having to use a shaving cream. Soap or shower gel seems to work just fine for me. I'm sure there are ladies who need to use for whatever reason but my shower gel lathers just as well.

The little travel case the came with the razor was also a nice touch. I don't travel much but it is nice to store the razor in and will be handy for an upcoming spring break trip.

I have not checked the price of the razor to compare it to others but if you have sensitive skin I would highly recommend giving this razor a try. It is worth it!