Self Esteem Struggles

We all go through it as some point in life. We all have different ways of dealing with it. We all struggle with self-esteem at times in our lives. I struggled in school with it. Was I pretty enough to get a date? No because I didn't get asked to the dance. Am I smart enough? No because everyone else got an A on the test and I got a B. I have no talent because I didn't make the show choir. A few years later I struggled as a new wife. Is the house clean enough? No there is a spot on the kitchen window that my best friend pointed out. Is my laundry sparkling white and clean? No there is a hole is my husbands sock. Does dinner taste okay? No there is to much salt in the potato's. And then again I struggled with self esteem as a new mother. Can I lose the baby fat fast enough? No I never did. Is the baby sleeping through the night right away? No because I really have no idea what I am doing. Is the baby healthy? No because I'm not breast feeding. We all go through it in life. Maybe once, maybe twice, maybe several times. .or all the time. Self doubting ourselves or do we doubt ourselves because of what someone said to us?

Right now I'm in self doubting self esteem low spot. I know it won't last forever because I've been through it before. I'm questioning if I am smart enough for my job or not. Some of this comes from suddenly become one of the oldest members of the team and not the youngest. I am not getting respect with my seniority. It's aggravating. I'm constantly being shoved here or there and things being questioned. Starts working on your self esteem eventually. I know I am good at my job. Not great but good. I love my job but it gets harder and harder to deal with every day. The tears and frustration come daily instead of occasionally.

I'm feeling low self esteem in the friend department. So many friends that I thought were very close friends are no long friends. Not because something has happened. I've just realized that I am the one putting in all the work to the relationship. I backed off and found out just how good of friends I thought these people were. Another low blow to the self esteem. Guess they really weren't my friends. They only contact me when they need something from me. Not to just be my friend.

There is always the self image in the mirror self esteem. yeah so I'm pushing 50. . .I'm over weight but I eat healthy and work out. So I can't wear size 6 jeans like some of my friends. Wait? Friends? What friends? (see above paragraph) I don't feel like I need to wear the latest trends or be dressing like my 23 year old daughter. I feel I dress okay for my age. Not 23 or 73. But there is always that question when you look in the mirror? Do I look okay? No. . this doesn't match this or my shoes are scuffy or I wore this last week will anyone notice? Is my hair okay? No it's not. It's not straight like everyone is wearing it. I still rock the 80's poof. Why? Because I have cowlick and that makes my hair stand up. .might as well go with it instead of fighting it. Much easier. I think I'm aging pretty good. Not many wrinkles. A few fine lines forming here and there but not as  clean looking as other people I know. Why can't have their skin?

I am rereading my list of self esteem issues. Can I do something about them? Sure I can. I can keep doing what I am doing because I am me! I'm not everyone else. I can ignore the mirror. I can do my job the best that I know how. I can make new friends. I can continue to eat healthy and work out. I am reminded of the video that circulated a few months ago of the little girl in the mirror in the morning. Jessica's Daily Affirmation. I LIKE ME!


http://youtu.be/qR3rK0kZFkg

BzzAgent Reporting In Sir!

Bzz Agent Arthur reporting in on Cure'l Intensive Healing Lotion! I was pretty excited to get ask to review this product. I have a horrible dry cracked feet and are always looking for something to try on them to make them less lizardy looking. Lizardy? Is that a real word? I guess it is in my vocabulary!

Bzz Agent sent me some sample jars of this lotion and I've used 3 so far. Now I'm not a big lotion person. I don't like to use lotions because it takes forever to soak in and who has time for that when getting ready for work? So since I was going to try using this on my feet I decided I'd do the white cotton sock with the lotion at bedtime routine. Slather my feet in the Curel, pull on some white cotton socks and head off to snoozeville and let it do it's magic!

So far I'm not extremely impressed it. It's doing an okay job. About like other lotions I've used. My feet are not soaking the lotion up and it's staying on my feet all night. My feet are a little softer but nothing to major. Now I have also put one of the jars on my desk at work. My hands are constantly dry from handling so much paper and using the keyboard all day. I'm not super impressed with it here either. It's a bit thick for hand lotion and an hour later I'm still rubbing my hands together to get it to soak in. e

I'm going to continue using the product and see how it goes for a few more weeks. I'll report back in with a final evaluation!

This is Bzz Agent Arthur signing out!

Up Up and Away!

Wow! I went to my first Hot Air Balloon Festival last weekend! I don't think there has ever been one locally but I am sure it will now become a tradition. The event was held at our local fairgrounds along with live music, food and a few vendor's. 

The evening was perfect! The weather was not to hot and not to cold and a perfect evening to throw out a blanket or lawn chairs and take some snacks. 

We were able to watch them unload and assembly the balloons and several lifted off into the evening the sky and then returned. All evening you could walk around and go right up to the balloons and the owners. Ask questions, look inside and touch. It was really amazing how polite this crowd was and how it was a such a family event with many families with young children just enjoying an evening out. It was a fun date night for us!

The highlight of the evening was after dark! The balloons lite up the night with their amazing colors! So spectacular! They called it a "balloon glow" and was suppose to be set to music but I never noticed the music. .I was to involved of the simple beauty of glowing colors in the darkness!

Hello out there? Is anyone there? I am seriously debating changing my blog to a new location. I'm frustrated that I never get comments or that  nobody follows me anymore. I may not be the best writer in the world but I do enjoy sharing with other people what is going on in this adventure of life. Am I THAT boring? 

Another Funny Road Picture!

Here we go again! These funny things seem to always "pop" up when I am out and and about. We were on our way to Shipshewana this week when I found this mobile toaster with giant Pop Tarts in the parking lot! So cute and funny!

Want it FREE?

Free!!! Who doesn't like FREE? Especially when it is products we use every day! I suggest you sign up for to be a Buzz Agent! Fill out some surveys and wait on your FREE products to arrive. All you have to do is review them and submit the reviews! It's pretty simple! I was asked to review Kroger's Private Selection Brand of products. I received coupons to get purchase all these products FREE! I received panko bread crumbs, fresh loaf of whole garlic bread, maple syrup, a super sweet rub and jam! A total of $25 and I walked out of the store not paying a single shiny penny! I am also currently review Dr. Scholls insoles, Nature Valley Soft Oatmeal Squares, Wine and Prevacide. My daughter is reviewing Special K Bars and Venus Razors. We receive all of this in boxes in the mail! I highly suggest you check out being a Bzz Agent! Let me know if you sign up!

Highway Oddities!

Have you ever thought about the things you see while out on America's highways and byways?  You use to be have to try to explain things to people but now with all of us having Smart Phones everything is a quick click away from sharing! The above photo I took on 465 in Indianapolis! It sure caught my attention! Don't Drive Naked!!! Pretty sexy looking ad! It's for a company that does car wraps! In other words. .don't drive a naked car! Wrap it! Mostly used by companies for advertising but either way I thought this was pretty bold advertising! Try explaining that one to your 5 year old in the backseat!

Of course another trip this summer going thru the country we came around a corner and came bumper to snout with a pig who was out wondering the road.Thankfully his owner was close by tending a garden and came to the rescue. Other wise we would have had bacon for dinner! We really laughed hard at this one!

and another one. . parking! Why do so many people have problems with parking? I know this guy was probably trying to be a smart ass or just couldn't read! This was at the Indianapolis Airport. The sign t clearly states "compact car" but this guy shoves a super sized SUV in the parking spot! Now if the parking garage had been full I might understand a better but there were plenty of empty spots.

I can't wait to see what I find next! Keep those cell phone camera's handy America!!